Sunday, November 15, 2009

I saw that going differently in my head...

So often I look around at a moment or situation and think that it didn't go quite the way that I saw it happening originally. Pictures that I tried to take of Alaina. A conversation that went in a totally different direction. A relationship that has completely changed from what it used to be.

I like to have a plan. And a back-up plan. And a back-up, back-up plan. I plan for all of the different variables that might possibly happen. It's so incredibly frustrating when that carefully constructed plan comes crashing down. I want to throw my hands up and just quit planning things all together! After I've analyzed how my plan got a kink in it, I usually go right back to planning it again in a new way. I'm relentless.

However, there are times that my plans get changed and it's so much better than what I had planned. More exciting, more fascinating, more stable, etc. I tend to get so hung up in the fact that it wasn't the way I pictured it that I lose sight of how great the new plan is. I can only hope that as time goes by, I can learn to relax a little and let go of the crazy plans and just trust that there's nothing up ahead that I can't bear.

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