Wednesday, April 29, 2009

Childbirth Class:Week 3

I'm sad to say that our break from the crazy lady (as I affectionately call her) is over. Last night we focused on things the coaches can do during labor to help mom stay on track with her breathing. The first thing she mentioned is getting right in front of mom's face and telling her very firmly to focus. Riiiiiight. Knowing the gentle spirit that I am (ha!), I can tell you with confidence that this is not going to be a move that we use. My husband is smart enough to know that if he gets that close and starts barking orders, I'm liable to grab a handful of his hair and pull until I start to feel better. I love my sweetheart and I don't want to hurt him, but these are extreme circumstances people.

We were able to tour the hospital last night and see where we're going to be in a few weeks. It was pretty cool, though the highlight was when crazy lady decided to show us one of the antipartum rooms. Does she look on the sign to see if it's occupied?

Nope! She just walks right on in!

The room was definitely taken and I'm not sure mom was super thrilled to be barged in on.

On a serious note, I'm going to ask for your prayers. One of the girls in our class was admitted to the hospital and will be there until she delivers. She's only 31 weeks pregnant and they're trying to buy her a few more before they induce her. I cannot even begin to imagine how scared she is right now. Please pray for peace and healing for both her and the sweet boy she's carrying.

Thank you!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Childbirth Class: Week Two

I am happy to report that our class last night was much less eventful than last week. I'm sure that it has nothing to do with the fact that our regular teacher couldn't be there and we had a substitute teacher. Who, might I add, was awesome.

Going into last night, I was super bummed because my hubby is out of town and had to miss class. However, I am so blessed because my labor & delivery nurse happens to be a great friend and she attended with me. How awesome is that? In addition, Nina is best friends with the woman who was our sub so I was definitely in good hands.

The only downside to the whole evening was the labor video. Not specifically the video itself, but the two fabulous women who were whispering about how hard that particular phase was, etc. I leaned over and whispered as politely as possible, "NOT HELPING!" Nina laughed and promised that every second was worth it in the end. While I know that in my heart, the screaming woman on the screen is still haunting me a little.

The best part was practicing this weeks relaxation technique...massage. I feel very confident that it won't be quite so pleasant when I'm actually in labor pain, but last night it was pretty nice.

Overall, a much better experience than last week. Here's hoping that next week goes just as well!

Friday, April 17, 2009

Sweet Little Bunny

Yesterday, we went to the doctor's for our 3-D ultrasound pictures and it was incredible. I know that there is a real person in my belly, but seeing her sweet face for the first time was a moment that I will never forget. She was so cooperative and gave us a great picture with her eyes open. We can tell already that she's going to be a thumb sucker as she had it there almost the whole time!

You can't see it here but after a few minutes of blinking at us, she decided that we weren't so interesting and tried to take a nap. The picture below is one of my favorites because you can see her sweet little face so clearly. Bless her heart though, she got my fat cheeks!

Overall it was a great day for us! We can't wait to meet our sweet little bunny!

Jeremiah 1:5-"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart."

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Inappropriate Classroom Behavior

Last night, armed with two pillows and a blanket, we attended the first week of our childbirth classes. We were a little unsure of what to expect since we've never had a need to attend this kind of class before. Nothing, NOTHING, could have prepared us for the next two hours.

We arrived early and met the woman who will be teaching our classes. Off the bat, I'm wondering how many years it's been since she has actually been in labor. Seriously, I think she might be related to Methuselah (we later found out that she has 8 great-grandchildren). I admonished myself for being so judgmental and thought about all the wise older people that I have learned from over the years. After attending only one of our five classes, I can tell you with confidence that she is not going to be one of them.

We get in and settled into the very back row of the classroom. I usually don't sit in the very back because I'm a nerd, but Scotlon insisted and I am so glad that he did. As people are filing in, I'm secretly thrilled that I am not the largest woman in the room. I mean, I love the girls I work with but they're all dieting and skinny. It did something amazing for my self-esteem to sit with women who are not shrinking more by the day. We go around and everyone introduces themselves, when they're due, etc. Then we got down to business.

As we're discussing the progression of labor, our instructor picks up the skeleton pelvis and the doll so she can demonstrate. She shows the baby moving down and everything is going fine until she puts the pelvis back down on the table...with the baby's head still stuck in it. The baby is now sticking straight up at a 45 degree angle out of the pelvis. Perhaps if I had gotten enough sleep on Monday night this might not have been so funny. However, it caught me just right last and the laughter started. At this point, it was still containable though.

We move on to relaxation techniques and visualization. The woman on the tape she's playing has us visualizing ourselves in the womb, talking to our babies, what is your baby telling you? (My baby is telling me to get out...there's barely enough room for her in there)! Then we're imagining our babies in the ocean with water all around. (What the crap is my baby doing in the middle of the ocean? She can't swim people, she's going to drown! How is this supposed to be relaxing me)?

The tape transitions into relaxing each part of our body individually. Each appendage is getting heavy and warm. When she gets to our legs getting heavy and warm, soooo relaxed, all I can hear is Ron White doing his bit about floating down the river peeing on himself. I've got the giggles at this point and I am trying desperately not to laugh out loud. She then says to imagine ourselves warm and flaccid. I will not share my inappropriate thoughts here, but my composure took a nose dive and my shoulders were shaking uncontrollably. The girl in front of me turned around to glare at me, which only made me laugh harder. Not only am I not doing the breathing exercise, but I can't stop laughing long enough to suck in ANY air. The tape finally ends and the instructor lets us have a break. I bolt for the door as fast as my 30 week pregnant belly will let me, praying that I can hold in the laughter until I get outside.

Bear in mind, that we're only halfway through the class at this point. The rest was filled with more of the same uncontrollable laughter and praying that the time would pass quickly. The conclusion that we came to on the way home was that we essentially paid $75 for a self-esteem boost and a great abdominal workout.

I can't wait to see what's on the agenda for next week....

Friday, April 10, 2009

Happy Birthday Hailey!

Today is a very special day...27 years ago today my best friend was born! We didn't meet until 12 years later and I am so very glad that we did. A lot has changed over the last decade or so but our friendship has only grown. Through the years there have been mission trips, Top Gun viewings, boyfriend highs and lows, Friends' marathon weekends, crash diets, surgeries, weddings, funerals, babies, and everything in between. She has the biggest heart of anyone I know and I am so honored that she chooses to spend time with me! I could go on for days and still not come close to telling you how spectacular she truly is.

Hailey/Goose/NB, I love you more than words can say. I hope that you have the most fabulous day ever. I look forward to celebrating many more birthdays with you in the years to come!

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Pregnancy Brain

My daughter is slowly draining all of my brain cells from my body. I promise that I used to be an intelligent person before I got pregnant. In fact, I used to secretly scoff at the girls who blamed "pregnancy brain" for their space-cadet moments. I am here today to tell you that pregnancy brain is very real. I forget what I am saying mid-sentence. I walk out and climb into my car, only to realize that my keys are sitting on the counter. I will ask you a question three times, listen to your response, and still walk away without knowing the answer. It's gotten proportionately worse, the farther along I get in my pregnancy. However, last night takes the cake.

I was working on a special gourmet dinner of Hamburger Helper and Five-Cheese Bread (don't be jealous of my mad cooking skills), and everything was going along fine. Ground beef is done, I added the additional liquid needed, set the timer, and walked away. When the timer went off I came back and instead of seeing a finished meal, I see white & grey gunk. Confused, I open the lid and stare at the pot for a good two minutes trying to figure out what went wrong. I call Scotlon to ask if he thinks it looks odd when I notice the box sitting off to the side.


I realized at that moment that while I added liquid, I never actually added the box of Hamburger Helper. Even though his shaking shoulders were giving him away, I give my husband serious credit for not laughing out loud as he tried to console his overly-emotional, pregnant wife.

Perhaps boxed meals aren't idiot-proof after all...